I'm Wilma. Girl. No dragon tattoo. I love theatre, fashion, music that makes me orgasm and taking pictures. I have split myself between three places (London-Stockholm-Tallinn), but my current hub is Tallinn. Wherever my circus goes, there's always a party. If the party does end, I watch cat videos and blog about it all. Check out my yearly summaries below to get to know me a bit better. Header: Mandel Photography

If you have any questions: hemafruu@gmail.com.

Monday, May 31, 2021

Wilma Circus in May 2021

In May I stopped being pragananant 
and turned into MILF instead.

1st of May
International Labour Day.
No labour occured on my part:

2nd of May
At first I planned to stay in bed the whole day and not participate in life,
but dragged myself out to watch Formula 1 race (?!).
I was completely losing it:

3rd of May
Look at this fashion icon inspired by Charlie Sheen bowling shirts.
I just added some unexpected accessories:

4th of May
Fred really wanted the baby to come out on this day, so he could scream "May the Fourth be with you".
However, the Doctor killed those dreams. So I put on my faux fur coat and cruised around the town with a electric scooter while heavily pregnante (hoped for the baby to drop out).
Fuck plans, be glamorous:

5th of May
Instead of "Hello", I had to answer my calls "Still pregnant":

6th of May
I puked on the dog. 
My accomplishments are true inspiration to the humankind:

7th of May
Haiku about getting out of bed:
no, no, no, no, no
no, no, no, no, no, no, no
no, no, no, no, no:

8th of May
Feels like I am the only Estonian who is not sponsored by Wolt.
I have to pay for my food myself, such a peasant (no aboutyou code either):

9th of May
The veins on my hands will do the talking:

10th of May
Heatwave and 16 000 steps
aka I held back my venom and actually had a lovely day:

11th of May
I was briefly admitted into hospital, but was kicked out shortly after that due to overcrowding.
Unplanned freedom? Didn't mind if I do:

12th of May
The amazing weather opened magical door in my wardrobe.
OPTIONS, I haz them!

13th of May
Bye, bye! Checking in to premium spa hotel:

14th of May
The spa treatment offered ultimate detox procedure that wasn't a pretty picture.
So here is gourmet food instead:

15th of May
The pear was fine:

16th of May
What's on the menu?
Loads of medicine supported by water and Oatly chocolate milk:

17th of May
Dieting is when you eat food that makes you sad:

18th of May
The dessert looked like poo (and tasted like it too)

19th of May
It tastes plastic and it's fantastic!

20th of May
Herring butter?! I mean, herring butter?!
This is pure evil:

21st of May
The spa didn't do miracles with my body,
but damn it feels good not be pregnante (damn, it felt good to be home):

22nd of May
Despite all the scary and new, I'm drinking choco milk cocktail (Oatly the true MVP) 
to celebrate my birthday. The dirty thirty got the ultimate gift – 
the Eurovision final on her birthday (JA-JA-DING-DONG):

23rd of May
The flower courier service had to do some extra shifts, 
because people sent me consolidation gifts since Switzerland didn't win:
#blessed #old #pushgift:

24th of May
A new peak in life – met up with friends to have a walk around the block with baby strollers:

25th of May
Two very pooped parents:

26th of May
My hands are praying that someone would take the Christmas lights down:

27th of May
Despite sleepless nights and fragile state of mind,
bitches love spring:

28th of May
G-Force and Wilma celebrating their 30th trip around the Sun:

29th of May
Collection Of Style store was opened in Tallinn
and this vain woman made more mirror selfies than should be allowed:

30th of May
Dreaming about that "Baby user guide" that never arrived:

31st of May
Maximum adulting day, since Fred went back to work.
My meditation technique is "Freaking out 101":

Yes, it has been an interesting month.

Friday, April 30, 2021

Wilma Circus in April 2021

Oh boy, the circus is shut down due to corona and Wilma is pissed.

In April I was busy being pregnant and complaining about it. Every day I thought it will be the final day, however I needed to be pregnant the day after, and a day after that, again and again. It just would not stop.

Luckily the unsolicited advice from other people didn't stop either. Comments about baby's gender "Raised it like a real boy or a real girl". Comments about my looks "You're so big" or "You're so small". Random comments about random shit "You will not sleep or eat two years in a row" or "When will you get the next one?". The last one is especially annoying since the commentators knew that it's an IVF kid.

However, Fred has been amazing. Listening, rubbing me the right way and not filing for divorce. Eleven years of love still going strong.

1st of April
No April Fools', just pregnant jewels.
Wilma Circus comes to the rescue after she heard that her friends have zero pregnancy pictures
(SPOILER ALERT: one of these tummies made an exit during April):

2nd of April
Good Friday with a good boye:

3rd of April
First drops of vitamin D accompanied by Barack Obama memoirs.
Look at this bloody grownup:

4th of April
The whole family had to eat Zyrtec so I could enjoy some tulips indoors.
I have somehow dodged the allergy bullet:

5th of April
Our unborn baby's first studio session.
Fred is really determined to play music to the baby and record anything that is happening inside there:

6th of April
After long such-much Christian weekend
I felt truly holy with my glorious halo:

7th of April
Trying to trick myself into thinking that I'm working out
while walking on the basketball court:

8th of April
Worried about the day after

9th of April
The day after came and I checked into a hospital.
The preparation was on point, since snacks and podcasts calmed me down 
and the procedure was a great success:

10th of April
I'm all about buns and bumps:

11th of April
I'm TNT, I'm dynamite.
I'm TNT, watch me explode:

12th of April
I heard that wearing curtains is very on trend this season.
(the spring had arrived, seeing the first tick and a midge):

13th of April
Terrible-terrible day that sucked so hard. I had no energy. I had no will to live.
I wanted to shove meditation and yoga to someone's ass:

14th of April
Washed my hair, brushed my teeth and headed to the city centre.
Amazing one hour spent outside my guarding homewalls:

15th of April
I am the new Michelin man:

16th of April
It's alright, it's ok,
I'm gonna pump air into the wheels someday:

17th of April
Hello MTV, welcome to my second crib.
I'm ready for that building gig in Finland:

18th of April
I went to stand outside to get fresh air.
I was outstanding:

19th of April
Closing buttons is so overrated:

20th of April
Gotta love that the clinic has no elevator and my legs are not made for walking.
Praying quietly to the science Gods that this would be the last visit to the doc:

22nd of April
Our last year's Foals concert got postponed to this year
aaaand it got postponed again. Rather sad, although I cannot imagine jumping
at a sweaty rock concert with all the strangers.
Think about the germs! Think about the closeness!
It felt safer to be rebel at home:

23rd of April
Look at this messy zebra:

24th of April
This bird cannot fly:

25th of April
The moment where your limits of 'high waisted' have reached the new heights:

26th of April
I told Šarik that other dog owners tell their doggos "Come to momma or dadda"
and he just wanted to go back to the animal shelter:

27th of April
The dullness of life and thereof:

28th of April
Heavily preggo lady and doggo with short legs 
really enjoyed climbing those "access friendly" tram stairs.
But we did it, although people probably thought again that I'm pooljota:

29th of April
Look at these redneck that sold their couch
to replace it with plastic garden furniture. Stay classy!

30th of April
I didn't manage to shake the pregnancy off (as was planned for April),
so I turned into human disco ball instead: