I'm Wilma. Girl. No dragon tattoo. I love theatre, fashion, music that makes me orgasm and taking pictures. I have split myself between three places (London-Stockholm-Tallinn), but my current hub is Tallinn. Wherever my circus goes, there's always a party. If the party does end, I watch cat videos and blog about it all. Check out my yearly summaries below to get to know me a bit better. Header: Mandel Photography

If you have any questions: hemafruu@gmail.com.

Sunday, January 03, 2021

My year 2020 – cancelled plans, new home and bloated belly

1. What describes 2020? C-19 pretty much stole the show. I have gone through complete despair in March/April. Got my shit together during the summer, but still remained socially distant throughout the year. Large crowds give me anxiety and travelling seems like a vintage luxury. 9 year old Mich said it right about 2020 "Like looking both ways before crossing the street and then getting hit by a submarine."

2. Something that you hadn't done before? Never have I ever been growing a human in my belly. However, the gorgeous glow I have came from the fact that our song was played on the radio (5:00 mark). Also, I am smarter than I think, since I was invited to oppose a master thesis as a specialist of the subject!

3. Where did you travel? Remember that 10th year anniversary trip I took to JapanI truly want to smack my younger self, who was constantly complaining over lack of travelling and thereof. Little did she imagine what 2020 would look like. Okay, I got my Stockholm cruise and a flight trip to Warsaw in 2020. #blessed

4. Greatest achievement of 2020? 
  • Changing jobs. Tonnes of scary, yet completely right decision (miss my staff discount though).
  • Despite fertility issues, I managed to get pregnant. In science we trust. Bring on the shit storm!
  • Talking about health, I gave tonnes of tests, but I probably dodged the C-19 bullet.
  • Celebrated 10 years together with Fred.
  • We invaded Mars aka we bought a new home.
  • I cycled 95 km during one day in April (oh, the butt ache the day after)
  • Nothing still beats that our musical talent reached mainstream radio and that I managed to keep my New Year's resolution (took a photograph of myself 366 days straight).

5. Best purchase? 
  • Those plane tickets to Japan together with accommodation. Spent some money, got full refund, that's one great investment deal.
  • Hello residential mortgage, hello grown-up points. Tonnes of responsibility, scare mixed with joy. 
  • Overall, I'm rather fortunate to be able to keep my job, even change it, during a global crisis. I have a possibility to work from home, my income is secured and I'm rather safe under my blanket. I'll now sit down and be humble for a sec.  

6. Moment that made you really happy? My birthday camp party, Ian as a tram driver and hearing the baby's heartbeat after a shocking stay at the hospital.

7. Saddest moments? 16th of April and 18th of November.

8. What song reminds you of 2020? Our song, because Minu baby mama viljastatud munarakust ei tee mingit draamat.

9. Favourite TV show in 2020? Not did I only start watching Õnne 13 again, but I visited the filming sites around Tallinn. Life goal achieved! Okay, don't laugh. I actually started and finished a completely new show, the Mad Men. If you know me, then this is a rather big deal. 

10. Favourite book 2020? Started reading the Game of Thrones books and they are even better than I thought.

11. Best theatre play in 2020? Thanks for C-19 we only managed to see "The Hundred-Year-Old Man Who Climbed Out the Window and Disappeared". The other time we went to see the wrong play and the third time I puked in the toilet instead of seeing the play. Last time I saw so few theatre pieces was when I was a toddler.

12. Best record and concert in 2020? Usually Foals concert a year, keeps the mind clear. Yet again, we followed the tradition and had Foals (Berlin) concert tickets in the bag, but as the whole 2020 was cancelled, so was this gig. It is now postponed to my birthday in 2021.

13. How do you remember year 2020? The process of making new life is unavoidably messy and raw. Especially during a global pandemic. Also this and banana bread.

14. Humans of 2020? my husband Fred steals the show every year. But I would also like to thank Ian, who has given me more joy than he realises, those smart IVF doctors that put a baby in my belly and my talented and caring friend Lepik, who repeatedly restores my faith in humanity and lava lamps. 

slow yet forward looking

My only two trips abroad happened that month.
1. Before Tallink's worst days started, we went on a Stockholm cruise with the Golden Girls:

We all got what we needed: baby mother got two nights of sleep,
the Swede got to breathe fresh Swedish air and 
the ginger got new wardrobe for her significant other:

2. Business trip to Warsaw.
Rerouting my movement according to & Other Stories locations:

3. I started taking one picture of myself every day:

with a lot of lasts

A lot of final events – organised the last press event, 
attended huge basketball game, took part in business meetings. 
Looking back to it, this all feels so rebel:

‣ Read a lot of information about Japan because, you know, had a plan to fly there the month after.
‣ My mind and body was pretty much under control, I even started going to yoga classes.

the C-19 diary start

I was in utter despair because I truly thought that the world will come to an end 
and we will all die.

‣ On the day of Fred's birthday state of emergency was announced.
‣ No trip to Japan for us, we got to enjoy the home office instead.
‣ Online grocery shopping had become main national sport.

Accepting the major historical event
& celebrating 10 years with Fred

These buns were so 2020:

In the shade of historic events Fred and I celebrated our 10th year together:

To celebrate our 10 years around the sun together, we booked a trip to Japan

There's no surprise there, that C-19 cancelled our flight.
The shitty situation inspired us to use toilet seat as props.
After the photoshoot we got an angry call from my granny, 
who truly thought that we flew out:

‣ My physical achievement of the year was to cycle 95 km (oh, my ass hurt the day after)
‣ Šarik moved away and I watched through all Mad Men episodes.
‣ One dream came true, when I visited Õnne 13 sets.
‣ With slow steps we started to meet friends and family again.

Overall, I got my force back:

Back to the office & my lovely birthday

With social distancing and fresh air preventing skin aging in mind, 

The smell of campfire on every clothing item and
 the sound of inflating the air mattress ♥

Leaving a lot of emotional baggage behind in the woods
and felt genuinely happy:

‣ Dead flowers, dustrolls and stinky rubbish – back in the office after two months away.
‣ The beginning of the IVF treatment.
‣ The daylight got longer, the social distancing allowed to meet some friends 
and my birthday uplifted my lost-in-deep-hole mood.

Enjoyed the chance to dress up again:

The bandcamp & notable achievements

Summer solstice and 2am fabulousness:

It's an absolute joy that the band is still together 
and producing amazing music – one song every year:

In the end of the month T-Lo and I visited Maris.
It was the hottest day in 2020:

‣ We went to a restaurant first time after the lock down. Staying home was much cheaper.
‣ COS, & Other Stories and Arket opened their online store in Estonia.
‣ I opposed one master thesis and acted as an expert of the subject.
‣ In June I started the negotiation to change jobs.

Strong traditions – Memmede Suvetuur & Karl's birthday

The tradition of Memmede suvetuur is alive and strong 
(we did domestic tourism before it was cool).

It was a two star hotel until these three stars arrived:

The 31th July tradition is strong and always in my calendar.
In 2020 Karl turned dirty thirty (but looked like 18):

I was vibing that night with good company,
so I even had a glass of wine, or two...

Thank you for being a friend!

On Karl's birthday I had my de facto last day at work.
Bitter sweet:

‣ Decided something big, which included me giving in my resignation letter.
‣ I worried about the future, but it turned out just fine.

Joyful vacation and new job

The month started with celebration of love,

We love wedding invitations! 

Hottest wedding band is taking 2021 bookings:

In August we traditionally spent Ian's birthday at Haapsalu.
It's always one og the yearly peak moments:

Haapsalu Fashion Week street style:

Take me back to this summer evening,
I miss the mermaids and the warm breeze: 

The birthday celebrations did not end there. 
He drove it. He loved it. His future career is secured:

We felt fabulous. We farted glitter:

Müürivahe makes the world go round:

‣ Had the loveliest summer vacation including boat trip on Emajõgi, 
dazzling wedding, Kuressaare SPA treatment, Käsmu romance and Ian's birthday festival.
‣ Started a new job in the end of the month.

The autumn came with new challenges

What happened with sunken ship Estonia? Will we survive C19 second wave?
So many questions, but at least we have unlimited disinfectant liquid supply:

I tried to be best at my new work while constantly puking: 

No changes
tried to keep on keeping on

This is how I tried to look like to the outside world:

This is how I actually felt: 

‣ Understood my new position and started to enjoy myself.
‣ Had a visit to the emergency room and hid a secret.

Hospital scare & growing belly

‣ Had a little bougie getaway to Viljandi and enjoyed my favourite, the hotel breakfast.
‣ Felt like a princess when watching the Crown.
‣ Checked into a hospital for an overnight stay and found out that the food is TERRIBLE there.
‣ The C-19 second wave switched us into full home office mode again.

Revealing the bloated tummy

One moment I was fed up with wearing pyjamas and looking like a homeless person.

Wilma loves Fred yesterday, today and tomorrow.
(For your pleasure you can now go back and check my tummy on every picture: 

‣ We moved into our new home.
‣ I pictured myself every day, 366 days straight, and kept my New Year's resolution 100%:

How I remember my grown-up years (so far):
2010 – started dating Fred and moved to the UK
2011 – enrolled at university and moved back to Estonia
2012 – joined the Erasmus Programme to study in Stockholm
2013 – both Fred and I moved back to Estonia, ending our long distant relationship. 
Started working at H&M.
2014 – first chill year with no big events. Plenty of travelling.
2015 – quit my job and moved back to Stockholm. Conquered many obstacles.
2016 – finished my bachelor degree and started Marketing & PR career in Estonia
2017 – got married and moved to our own apartment
2018 – took Šarik home from the shelter
2019 – graduated and received my master's degree
2020 – bought a new home and started renting my uterus out to a new tenant

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